HOLLYWOOD, CA—In what entertainment-industry insiders are calling "an exciting new development," the vagina of aspiring actress Sierra Nicole Lennox, 20, was photographed Monday from a variety of alluring angles.
The photo session is widely regarded as the first step on the road to fame and fortune for the young actress, who film and TV executives throughout the greater Los Angeles area are calling a "striking, white-hot new talent" with a "really great-looking vagina."
"I'm extremely excited about this latest career move," a bathrobed Lennox told reporters shortly after completing principal photography. "I've already seen some of the initial demo photos and, if I do say so myself, my vagina looks fantastic. But I want everyone to understand that this is only the beginning. Once these pictures of my vagina start getting circulated and creating a 'buzz' around town, I'll be able to move on to what I'm really interested in doing: starring in and perhaps directing major motion pictures."
"I'm not just another pretty vagina," Lennox added.
According to semi-professional talent agent Murray Pisarcik, 49, who photographed the young woman's genitals in the basement studio of his Van Nuys home, Lennox's vagina "definitely has what it takes" to propel her to Hollywood superstardom.
"Sierra's vagina is really something special. In this town, aspiring starlets are a dime a dozen. But she's not like the other girls you see waiting to be discovered at the counter of the Denny's on Sunset Boulevard," Pisarcik said. "She's got the kind of vagina that just lights up a room."
Lennox, born Dolores Ellen Niehrud, was known as "the prettiest girl in town" in her hometown of Olathe, KS, where she was the star of her high-school drama club, starring in Oklahoma!, The Music Man and Pippin before moving on to study theater at Emporia (KS) Community College. Though her talent continued to blossom at ECC, she said she quickly realized her ambitions were bigger than Kansas could hold. Within six months, she was waitressing in L.A.
"Emporia was great, but I soon figured out that Hollywood was where the action was," Lennox said. "I had talent, but I knew I couldn't sit around forever. I had to go for it while the time was ripe. After all, my vagina wasn't getting any younger."
Explaining the decision to have her vagina photographed, Lennox said: "When you're just starting out like I am, you need to do something special to stand out from the crowd. You need to get yourself noticed and create a 'buzz,' and showing people your vagina is a great way to do that."
Though Pisarcik said he and Lennox are still weighing their options regarding the vaginal pics, the photographer said several "very attractive offers" are currently on the table. "I've got a possible sale already lined up to www.eagerbeaverz.com, and both Gent and Swank have expressed interest," Pisarcik said. "So the industry response is definitely there."
"Remember this vagina," Pisarcik added, holding up an 8x10 glossy of Lennox's pubis. "Take a good look now, because before long, everybody's who's anybody will recognize it. This vagina's on a one-way rocket-ship ride to the top, baby!"
Industry power players who have seen advance copies of the photos agreed that Lennox's vagina has real star power.
"This is the kind of vagina you see once, maybe twice in a lifetime," said Paramount Pictures executive Barry Wolk. "I predict Sierra Nicole Lennox will be the next Glenn Close. Photos don't lie: That's talent, baby. Sheer, unadulterated talent."
"Just look at this vagina," agreed Andrew Black of 20th Century Fox. "The camera loves it. With a knockout vagina like this, the girl can't miss."
For all her success, Lennox admitted she had her doubts at first.
"When I first moved to Hollywood, sure, I was scared. I thought, 'What if I'm not good enough? What if people don't like my vagina?'" she said. "You hear so many horror stories about how this town eats people alive. But I've found that's all a myth. Everyone I've met has been so supportive and friendly, especially when it comes to taking pictures of my pubic region."
"I just know I'm going to be a big star," Lennox added, smiling brightly. "All my hard work is finally paying off."
With success and fame just around the corner, Lennox and Pisarcik are planning a weekend getaway to the Tarzana, CA, Motel 6 to reflect on her big break and ponder the next move.
"We're on our way," said Pisarcik, packing hurriedly. "I told Sierra she could make the biggest debut splash since Meryl Streep appeared in Naked Nymphos back in 1976. But we're not letting success go to our heads. We're going to handle this well. Sierra's going to have a lot of decisions to make as far as what projects she wants to take on. As for me, once the money starts rolling in, I'm going to pay my back alimony and take care of my debts at the dogtrack."
"Sure, the initial rush of getting my big break is exhilarating," Lennox said, "but this is only the beginning. I bring a lot more to the table than just a great vagina. I'm bursting with energy and willing to do whatever it takes to make it. So get ready, Tinseltown: I'm gonna spread my wings and show the whole world just what Sierra Nicole Lennox is all about.
No comments:
Post a Comment