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Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Out For Blood.

No, its not the title of a new movie on which I am working.

Someone stole my wallet at the gym today. I am not in New York, I am in Los Angeles.

I am now an illegal immigrant. I have no wallet. I have no ID. No credit cards. And no cash. Thankfully, I still have my phone and my keys. Otherwise, it would be even worse.

Ive cancelled all my cards. While canceling my AMEX, the operator told me my card had just been used at a gas station. Fucker took it right to the pump to gas up.

I am literally furious. I cannot replace anything I’ve lost from L.A., except my AMEX (which they will send anywhere) and my license (Dave is sending me a duplicate license I had in my apartment in New York). I’ll have to convince someone I know to cash a check for me – for tomorrow, to get through, that’s what is going to have to happen.

Fun stuff, I know.


Thursday, March 20, 2008


I may have slightly mortgaged my manhood to do this, but at least it wasn't monetarily expensive. Yes, I know its kind of a girly car for a strapping youngish fellow like me, but I am a sucker for convertibles and this thing was a great deal and is in nice condition and looks decent for going to meetings where people judge you by this kind of thing. And it gets 33 miles to the gallon supposedly, which doesn’t’ suck for the environment or for my depleted wallet. And did I mention it was cheap. So if it isn’t the most macho of cars, forgive me. Maybe I am getting in touch with my feminine side. Anyway, when you come to LA I’ll pick you up from the airport in it, we’ll ride around with the top down and you’ll get it.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Where’s he been?

My hard drive died out of nowhere two weeks ago. It took them a week to figure out that the data was totally unrecoverable (ugh) and then it took another week for me to get my computer back with a new hard drive. I have it back, and its somewhat glitchy. I am paranoid now about losing more data, and I am even more paranoid about not having the computer for any further length of time.

Life has been pretty normal the last few weeks, despite the lack of computer. Well, its been normal for not having a computer, which is agony. Agony, I tell you. Agony. Enough (ok).

I am back now. I don’t have much to say right at the moment, but here’s a few snippets.

• Met George Clooney again the other night at the Stone Rose. He and I were both head bobblingly buzzed, and he kept telling me to get home saft. I hope he wasn’t telling me to leave. He was pleasant as he always is. I think he should run for governor.
• I had a weird LA club experience last weekend, which involved me being repeated kissed on the mouth by a young, comely lass whose acquaintance I’d never met. She was going to kiss me on the cheek after I took a picture for her and her friends, and I demurred. After four kisses over a ten minute period, she vanished.
• I’ve joined a gym in LA, and been very good about going. My roommate is a workout fanatic and I’ve been ten days out of twelve or thereabouts since I’ve joined. I’m feeling pretty healthy and mostly sore as a result.
• The hovel improvement works continue to mount, but more is still necessary. I am eagerly awaiting a new bathroom floor to take us out of the nineteenth century (seriously).
• I am also shopping for a car. For those who don’t know, LA is the used car capital of America. What I mean by that (and since I am the one who decided it’s the capital, this meaning is quite important) LA is the best place in the United States to buy a used car. Why? Good question. Because (1) everyone in LA has a car, (2) everyone wants a new car every two years, (3) so there are tons of cars for sale, making it a buyer’s market, and (4) the dry weather means that cars don’t rust, or have many of the other problems associated with wet and cold weather. I am thinking, convertible.

That’s about all for now.